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November 30, 2001
Jax: Smell that?
Skye: You mean the stale beer or the burning fat or the swamp out in back? Oh, wait, I'm getting the smell of human sweat now.
Jax: The beer's not stale here, ok? And that is not fat burning, it is grilling and boiling.
Skye: Fine, I flunk the stench test. Can we go now?
Jax: You can go whenever you want. I'm here on a mission.
Skye: A mission? What are we doing in a place called Gulleysville, not that you need to explain the name, mind you. I kind of assume it has something to do with the gulley we just landed in.
Jax: Listen, ok? You're here cause you stowed away on my plane.
Skye: I had no idea you'd be going to Okefenokee Swamp.
Jax: That's in Georgia, we're in Louisiana.
Skye: Pardon me for confusing my swamps. So, what's the secret mission?
Jax: It's not one you could handle.
Skye: I can handle anything. Try me, I dare you.
Jax: The fact is you have invaded my privacy, so you're going to find out a few things about me I would prefer that never left this table, ok?
Woman: Jax!
Jax: Maggie Lynn!
Maggie Lynn: Now, why didn't you call me and tell me you were coming, hmm?
Jax: How else am I going to find out if you're cheating on me?
Maggie Lynn: Oh, you're not cheating on me, are you?
Jax: No, this is my business associate, Skye.
Maggie Lynn: Well, what can I get you and your business associate?
Jax: Ah, fried oyster poor boy, the crawfish...
Maggie Lynn: Fried, boiled, or steamed?
Jax: ...fried, catfish...
Maggie Lynn: Fried, boiled, or steamed?
Jax: ...fried, and the shrimp.
Maggie Lynn: Fried, boiled, or steamed?
Jax: Fried, and a big basket of hushpuppies.
Maggie Lynn: And for you?
Skye: Something sterilized.
Jax: Try the gator, ok? And if you don't like it, then I suggest the frog legs, I dare you.
Skye: I'll have the frog legs and gator.
Maggie Lynn: Fried, boiled, or steamed?
Skye: Fried.
Maggie Lynn: And to go with that, hushpuppies or fries?
Jax: Best hushpuppies in the world.
Skye: What are hushpuppies?
Jax: They're...it's fried bread, ok? She'll have the hushpuppies.
Maggie Lynn: Hmm, iced tea, water, or beer?
Jax: How's the water been lately?
Maggie Lynn: Huh, you wouldn't want to drink it.
Jax: I'll have the beer.
Skye: Would that be the same water that's in iced tea?
Maggie Lynn: Mm-hmm, ok, one iced tea. I'll be back with your pickles and hushpuppies.
Skye: Oh, well, I guess for dessert, everyone around here has a heart attack. So, what's the secret mission, that trailer trash?
Jax: That woman happens to work 12 hours a day, six days a week, but, no, Maggie Lynn is not my mission. I came for food that you can't get anywhere but here.
Skye: Wait a minute, my life is on hold so you can eat greasy food instead of helping me with serious business?!
Jax: Food is serious business to me.
Skye: You jerk!
Jax: Mmm, how's the gator?
Skye: Fried.
Jax: I told you you couldn't handle it, you mind?
Skye: Help yourself.
Jax: Thanks. Mmm, oh, you don't know what you're missing.
Skye: Actually, I do. At the moment, Sonny and my Grandfather are probably dotting their Is and crossing their Ts on their new alliance together while AJ is desperately trying to track us down, having no idea that we're in the middle of some Godforsaken swamp that no satellite would ever dare cross over!
Jax: We're not in a swamp.
Skye: I can't believe that I am stuck in the middle of this Hellhole with a smug, spoiled billionaire who's eating gator.
Jax: Look, if you want to leave, that's fine. I'm sure there's a bus that stops out front, you know, every couple of days, but if you're going to stay, I suggest you change the subject because you're starting to bug me, ok, and I don't like being bugged when I'm eating. In fact, I don't like being bugged at all!
Skye: Why you arrogant little...
Jax: Yes, I'm arrogant! I do what I want, when I want and I don't ask permission from anyone, especially stowaways with entitlement issues. Look, I come here to get away from headaches like you, ok, so, please.
Skye: So, what else do you like to do, hmm, when you can't sit still long enough to consume lard with swamp creatures?
Jax: I like to dance. Yeah, I like to dance, in fact, I feel like dancing right now.
Skye: Huh, I wouldn't dance with you right now if you paid me by the step.
Jax: Did you hear me ask you?
[Bayou music plays as Jax dances with Maggie Lynn]
Jax: Whoo-hoo!
Maggie Lynn: Oh, you got a little move, not bad.
Jax: No problem, thanks.
Maggie Lynn: Oh.
[Jax returns to the table]
Skye: All right, all right. You've eaten, you've danced with the local trash, when can we leave this hovel?
Jax: Anytime.
Skye: Oh, thank God!
Maggie Lynn: Honey, do you need a doggy bag?
Skye: No, thank you.
Jax: Ok, so which way was it again? A left or a right out the front door?
Maggie Lynn: Left, about a quarter mile up the road.
Jax: Thank you.
Skye: What is a quarter mile up the road?
Jax: The motel.
Skye: Excuse me?
Jax: Oh, yeah, we're grounded in Gulleysville for the night.
Maggie Lynn: Here you go, honey, here's your change.
Jax: Thank you, see you later.
Maggie Lynn: Ooh.
[Jax laughs]
Skye: I am not spending one night in this place just so you can sleep with the waitress!
Jax: Would you lower your voice?!
Skye: Well, I am not staying here!
Jax: Fine! The bus stops out front every other day, ok? But if you hear a rustling in the grass, I suggest you climb up something because the gators, they like to come out at night and feed, see you.
Skye: Well, well, would you wait? Please? Wait!
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Skye: How can we be having equipment problems?! I was in the co-pilot's seat on that plane, I saw it land safely. Admit it, this isn't about mechanical problems, this is about punishing me! You want to torture me by making me spend the night in the middle of this swamp rather than get me home!
Jax: You know what? I would rather sleep in the swamp than spend another moment with you! That man who approached me owns the airfield, he landed shortly after we did and noticed that I had a problem with my left tire. He kindly offered to make a run to New Orleans to pick up a replacement. Can we take off with the one that's on the plane? Yes, but can we land safely? Can we?! Also, a good pilot doesn't fly with alcohol in his system. The truth is, I didn't plan on leaving tonight anyway and I don't care what you think because you're not even supposed to be here! You know, to call you insufferable, that would be kind. You're unspeakably rude and narrow-minded, not to mention hostile and tediously one-note. And you completely lack charm. You know, to sum it up, you are uniquely unlikable! It's no wonder your whole family despises you, and say what you will about Edward, at least he's entertaining.
[Skye storms out upset, later Jax hears her crying and enters her room]
 [Skye cries]
Skye: Go away.
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